Fort Road Blog

RNC protest crosses Fort Road (Popularly known as West 7th Street)

2008-09-02T21:13:00.001-07:00

Well, I have seen evidence of police brutality here...

but nothing, specifically, of protester unruliness, other than Tim Sherno claiming that the 5 Eyewitness News Team's camera had been spray-painted. Despite the running camera, there was no evidence of this crime in action. I haven't been much of a conspiracy-theorist since my college days, but...with all the video on the news and on youtube, is there any extant footage of protesters actually damaging any property or committing any crimes? I did witness Amy Goodman get arrested for asking police a question:

but other than that, I saw no malfeasance.

This from the New York Daily News:

Alan Rybak, a real estate agent from Lakeville, Minn., stood along the protest route carrying a sign that read "Support Our Troops."

"I'm here to support our troops and to tell (protesters) to get a job and go home," said Rybak, a Republican Party activist.

Hi, Alan! I'm a mom of three, a protester, and I have a job! Heyyyy, how 'bout that? The other people I knew at the protest were also gainfully employed. See, it was Labor Day, so a lot of folks had the day off and didn't actually have to be at their jobs. I, however, left the protest early because I had to work on Labor Day, since the RNC was in town and all. Oh...what's that? What were you doing on Labor Day? Oh, you had the day off and you decided to protest? Ohhhh, interesting! So you're a scumbag protester too? Maybe you should go back to Lakeville and work a little harder selling homes unethically, dickhead!

While on Fort Road, visit the Minnesota Children's Museum

2008-09-01T23:16:00.000-07:00

Riot on the West End

2008-07-15T20:44:00.000-07:00

"Riot"? Hmm. They make it sound so cool. Now that they put it that way, I'm kinda sad the crack house across the street is gone.

They neglected to mention that one of the perpetrators (the driver of the Cadillac) was charged with 5 counts of attempted murder. The end.

From Fort Road, signing off.

St. Paul Blog

2008-07-04T22:56:00.000-07:00

New blog I dig, digable kids:

St. Paul Real Estate Blog Stuffs

I mean, it's not new, but it's new to me. As the title says, it is ostensibly related to real estate but also contains tidbits about all things St. Paul, including arcane facts about why the city is laid out in the odd way it is, and pictures of the West End and pictures of downtown from the West End. To the average man, downtown makes a more interesting photograph. Sort of. To the thinking man, the West End has an amount of intrigue matched only by a chapter of Dashiell Hammett.

Good-bye, Smokestack

2008-06-28T23:16:00.000-07:00

Big news day. The old Xcel Energy coal plant smokestack was demolished. I feel the following video is a perfect way to capture the essence of the implosion and the West End in general:

We'll miss you, giant unsightly cement tower. Cough. Cough.

From Fort Road, signing off.

Beer sale

2008-05-25T19:12:00.001-07:00

The young gentlemen across the street had another party last night. I heard one of them yell, "Dude, the liquor store in Lilydale's sellin' 24-packs of Coors for $16!" About eight gentlemen then piled into their vehicle and peeled off. Bravo, gentlemen, bravo!

A party; hot dogs

2008-05-08T20:35:00.000-07:00

The people across the street from me had a little party today. Beer, hip-hop, grillin', and looking under the hood of their '80's Chevy. They were examining that car for a mighty long time.

Chris and Rob's Chicago Taste Authority opened in the former Villa Roma spot, Fort Road and Michigan Street (whose sign I featured here). Just so you know. I look forward to the opening of Jean-Luc and Pierre's Paris Taste Authority next month.

From Fort Road, signing off.

Signs of spring in my neighborhood

2008-05-04T21:44:00.000-07:00

Here they are, in sort of order, but not really:

1) Youths hauling a load of sturdy pitbull by solid iron chain.
2) Paint buckling on wood houses; vinyl trembling on vinyl houses.
3) Extra Popov boxes storing winterwear on porches from Chestnut Street to St. Paul Avenue.
4) Ambulances outside Keenan's 620 Club
5) Pedophilic-looking gents congregating in the park 'cross the street

Ahhhh. Breathe in. Smell that Fort Road air. Wish you was elsewhere.

From Fort Road, signing off.

The CrustACean Company

2008-04-09T20:25:00.001-07:00

The Crust*A*Cean Company, 1175 W 7th Street, a wholesale-to-the-public kind of joint selling seafood and steaks, seems defunct. Large swaths of dismembered cardboard adorn the windows. Their website is "under construction." But one never can tell, can one?

If you know of their impending revival, please inform.

From Fort Road, signing off.

Kissing = controversial

2008-03-28T21:05:00.000-07:00

As my common-law husband and I strolled merrily along Fort Road this evening, we gave each other a brief kiss on the lips. Mind you, there was no discernible tongue. Mind you, we are both of voting/drinking/warring age. Mind you, we have three children together. Nonetheless, a gentleman walking about 20 paces behind us shouted out, "Now, now, now!"

This is what happened; I am merely reporting.

From Fort Road, signing off.

The Eggplant: Familiar or exotic vegetable?

2008-03-13T21:28:00.000-07:00

At Cooper's Grocery the other day, I was purchasing (among various other alimentary and sundry items) an eggplant. As it made its journey down the conveyor belt, the man in front of me, buying a lone can of Alpo which I suspect was for his own personal consumption, pointed at it and asked the cashier, "What is that?"

"Eggplant."

He turned to me. "Is that good?"

"I like it," I said. He just stared.

This is the second time at Cooper's that I've encountered a being ignorant of the eggplant's existence. Just wait 'till I buy a jícama.

From Fort Road, signing off.

P.S. Ryan tells me I oughtn't post others' photos on my blog. Yeah, well, fuck them. No one's looking anyway.

Death in St. Paul

2008-03-12T16:44:00.000-07:00

Dead body found today off of East 7th Street downtown, which is not technically Fort Road. I don't make it a habit to fraternize with folks from the Eastern regions of St. Paul. But still.

From Fort Road, signing off.

Some churches, weird state capitols, and a mosque made of mud.

2008-02-27T05:56:00.000-08:00

Here's St. Stanislaus Church, 398 Superior Street, in the gloaming.

I've always wanted to go inside, but I'm afraid of churches. I might burn up upon entry. I guess one could say I dig church architecture, and also funeral home architecture. Why can't all buildings be more like funeral homes? Here's a door on the Wulff-Godbout Funeral Home.

Here's my second-favorite church in St. Paul, the Virginia Street Swedenborgian church (this is not near Fort Road but in Cathedral Hill), and I must say, if I ever feel the need for a church wedding, it will be here.

It was designed by Cass Gilbert, who also designed the Minnesota State Capitol.

Yeah, looks like every other state capitol. Except Alaska's,

and Hawaii's.

As usual, they're the states that don't make any sense. Oh, yeah, New Mexico's is different too.

And North Dakota's.

Seriously? Who knew North Dakota would be so iconoclastic when it came to its capitol building? That must be the tallest building in North Dakota.

The prize for bad-ass capitol building goes to the former capitol of Louisiana, which looks thus:

What the fuck? But the bastards replaced it, for God knows what reason, with this:

Among the standard domed capitols, Iowa's is the coolest.

It looks almost mosque-ish. Oh yeah, not to be un-American, but I also dig Mosque architecture. Here's the weirdest mosque I've ever seen, in Larabanga, Ghana.

Oh, and my favorite St. Paul church? The Old Muskego Church.

From Fort Road, signing off.

A wee intro

2008-02-25T21:07:00.000-08:00

This photo is a haiku of sorts, and says everything you need to know about Fort Road:

What is it advertising? Does anyone actually care? What sort of an aesthetic statement does it make? Do aesthetics even matter? Do signs matter? Does proper, loving maintenance of your business matter? Does factual information play a relevant role in today's economically depressed sections of mid-sized Midwestern cities? Ponder these.

This sign is not a recent act of vandalism, as it has been this way since just after a humble sign proclaimed, "UNDER NEW OWNERSHIP." Shortly afterwards, the place went dark (it's a very underwhelming pizza place). Also note that the scattered letters above the hours are an exact anagram of "PENIS LUNCH." I may go rearrange them at dawn.

I risked my life to take this shot:

Had a hapless imbiber exited at the moment my Canon went "click!," they would have been socially obliged to stab me. Trust me. I've been in Keenan's. I should win a medal of valor for this act.

Then I passed this fence on a 4-plex on Cliff Street.

Did a car smash into it? Or just an angry mob? We have no way of knowing.

From Fort Road, signing off.

Welcome to the West End, Bitch

2008-02-23T18:36:00.000-08:00

This blog shall henceforth be dedicated to the comings and goings, foibles and follies of the workaday chaps, lost souls, hard-drinking hobos, gentrifying Audi owners, washed-up artists, neglectful fathers, neglected sons, and others who comprise the slice of St. Paul that is Fort Road.

Most know Fort Road as West 7th Street. I don't like that name for two reasons. First, there is no 6th or 8th streets running parallel to it, except downtown. It is the only numbered street in the neighborhood. It just extends on past the downtown limits, acting as if it made sense. It doesn't. It was Fort Road first. Second, numbering streets is the finicky New York way. Midwest Pride, bitch! Humility is the only thing restraining the Midwest from greatness.

Opinions postulated herein are the sole provenance of the author, Kat Vapid, and in no way reflect or represent the denizens of Fort Road and its surrounding streets. However, I welcome information about amusing events, mishaps, odd crimes, bizarre individuals, heart-warming cat rescues, and other strange goings-on. If you are a current resident, former resident, aspiring resident, or simply passing through on your way to the airport, feel free to send me tidbits.